Resist The Devil And He Will Flee...

 As I have walked on my path to healing and rehabilitation, being open and unashamed seemed to be the best way to forgive myself and to continue getting stronger in the process. A lot of people questioned me about my relationship with 'Pastor' Slattery. Wasn't I unfaithful to him and that's why my kids were sent to my daughter's home to live for a year? No. Wasn't he driven to molestation due to my not fulfilling his needs as a wife? Again, NO!

Molesting children is a sick practice that has nothing to do with whether or not I was a good wife. It had nothing to do with my past relationship to my present husband. Anyone that thinks that needs to have their own head examined!

If there is any reason for what happened, it probably had more to do with the ex-Pastor's formative years, way before I ever laid eyes on him.

 There was, according to his own testimony, pornography around him as he was growing up, coupled with parents who didn't get along and a long history of unfaithfulness and alcoholism within the family. Something happened that twisted him enough that he acted out on these sick impulses toward his own kids. Unfortunately, I didn't see the signs.

(For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;) Proving what is acceptable unto the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret. 
(Ephesians 5:9-12)

One of my daughters said to me the other day, "There isn't a day that I don't think about how abusive he (Slattery) could be." I know....me too. However it is getting easier for me to pass those hurdles. I have learned a lot about child molesters. I have learned to tell the difference between what is 'normal' and what is not. You see, with my background, it was truly hard for me to see those boundaries. I have to remember that and be glad for the progress I've made.

But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light. Wherefore he saith, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light. See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, Redeeming the time, because the days are evil. 
(Ephesians 5:13-16)

As far as being open and honest about the whole thing, well...I am quite a bit more circumspect in my day to day dealings. My daughters are all beautiful, young women and though I cannot any longer protect the older ones, I can do what I can with the ones living home. Because boundaries were not taught throughout their growing up years, I have to try and teach them what is ok and what is not. This can be a challenge as young teens can certainly be magnets to young men who are over the legal age, and to those who are creepy pedophiles that stare at their backsides when they walk.

                                                                                                            What works for me is to publicly call the pervert, the predator... out. Yes, it may seem undignified to some of you yet to me, some 40-ish creeper staring at my daughter like she's a tasty treat is much more disturbing! I am no longer afraid or embarrassed to draw attention to these perverts. Remember, PERVERTS is what they are! I have been known, on more than one occasion, to say something along the lines of," Hey, you must be a pervert...my kid is only__teen ! I see you checking her out! You must be a pedophile!"  It may not solve the problem forever but it nips it in the bud for a bit. Not even a pedo wants to be publicly embarrassed like that. My guess is, most people either ignore the guy or are fearful of facing him. I have seen that look of shock when I apprehend the demons.

The Bible has a verse that reminds me not to fear these pedophile devils, who have hearts filled with lust for a child,: Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
(James 4:7)

That is what I aim to do.